Saturday, July 24, 2010

are these feelings normal???

so i haven't blooged in a few days because i've been watching true blood back to back for the past few days. *don't judge me. i've been off a couple days lol * hell, even tonight i'd be watching them but the website i go to is trippin so i decided to write for a bit before i go to bed. this weekend i probably won't be doing anything special. i have to work all weekend and i have a meeting on sunday morning that i have to go to that i really don't want to wake up for. i mean who has a meeting at 8am on a sunday????? only my boss. speaking my boss, i'm thinking about taking less of a role in my position. i really want to focus on MY life. i feel like this job is taking over my life. i find myself not really being happy at work. i mean don't get me wrong, i'm not depressed anymore or anything, but i just want to have a job that i can sit in an office and do a specific thing for 8hrs and go home stress free. i like my job, but i don't like the people that i work with too much. well mainly just one person. and i'm not saying that i'm going to quit because i don't like a particular person. i'm not stupid. i just want to have a job, be told the work that needs to be done, and when i finish i can go home. i'm thinking about moving to the operations side of the company. i just don't want to deal with people. i want to just work in peace. so we'll see what happens......


u ever feel like something is missing in your life but you aren't sure what it is? thats how i feel. well, i'm not sure if it's because i miss my friend, or if i just have that empty void that i want to fill. i'm thinking that it's a little bit of both mixed with my feelings being so wishy washy. i've noticed that i can really like or miss a person and then the next day i don't think twice about them. i don't think thats normal. i've been talkin to my ex more. i'd like to say daily but not really. maybe more like every other day. there are times when i want to tell her that i miss her or how i would like to see her and spend time with her, but then i have moments where i just don't want to open closed doors. i mean if she were to say something about us talking or dating again, i really don't know what i would say. but i'm 99% sure that she won't do that. she has a lot going on right now and i just don't see her wanting anything more than friendship. sure we can hang out from time to time, but it will probably stop there. which brings me back to my original thought, "is this what i'm missing in my life and am i just missing these girls because one isn't in my life while the other is?" as u can see this is a very complicated subject for me.


i had something else to talk about but i forgot. i think its the sleep that's starting to creep in. i've talk to you guys later.....

peace&love

2 comments:

  1. There was a saying "you don't know what you've got until it's gone and you don't know what you've been missing until it arrives".

    I'm one of those hopeless romantics that believes in destiny..so I think when it's your time, you'll know it. :-)

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  2. thanks kandia! that was really nice of you to say.

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