today on twitter there was a discussion about the "non existing" GOOD man. i'm so sick and tired of hearing this. women stay saying that good men don't exist or that "men aint shit" *excuse my french*. well let's think about that.what are YOU doing wrong? where are you getting or selecting your mates? where are u meeting these guys? the clubs? on beale street? the mall? i mean seriously. how do u expect to find a good guy when you are look in the wrong places? i wouldn't dare give my number to a girl at the club and think that she is "THE ONE". she's "the one" for the night. you can't possibly think that the guy that is a dope dealer, that already has 5 kids with 5 other women, is going to be a good man for you. he's in and out of jail constantly! but yet u staying by his side with a tattoo of his name on your neck. Get real ladies.
if a guy, like myself, comes to you on a respectable manor, you all brush us off. we are instantly put in the friend zone and you assume that we are the "push over" guy. Well that couldn't be any further than the truth. just because i don't sleep with every girl that walks past me or at least attempt to, doesn't mean that not any less of a man than the guy that is walking around with his pants hanging down. if you want a good man, stop settling for the trash that comes your way. just because u had a bad break up with an ex or he cheated on you, doesn't mean the next guy will. i'm not saying to just have your guard down, but don't have the wall at an unclimbable height. i would never take anything out on the next girl just because my ex did me wrong. if anything, i'm going to pick up on traits and signs to show me that you are either a good girl or someone i don't need to mess with.
idk if it's a nurturing, *that's not really the word i was looking for* thing that women feel the need to have someone around to make them feel "complete", not lonely, or what. but if you all take your time when you like a guy you will see what type of man he is. and stop sleeping with men so soon. that's key too. you want to see how long a guy will hang around? tell him you aren't having sex til you get married. see his response. No respectable man should want/wants to be with a woman that gives it up after a week (or less) as far as a relationship goes. At least I don't.......but what really bothers me the most about this, is that women already KNOW these things, but yet they want to STILL date the wrong type of guy and then a week or 2 later they want to curse the world.
man i had to get that off my chest. i'll check in with you guys later.....
peace&love
I'm so tired of reading about that same shit. As you said, MOST OF US KNOW when we're talking to a guy that we shouldn't but for whatever reason we continue to do it and then get mad and complain if/when shit hits the fan. If you're honest with yourself, really truly honest, you can always state what the signs were that glossed over when you first met the guy but bc you thought he was cute or whatever, you kept talking to him. Now while I don't necessarily agree with the superficial statements about a guys dress or him having kids has anything to do with how he treats you (bc we all know a few well dressed, educated,child free men who WILL dog a woman out lol) I just think people need to make better choices. Period. Stop being afraid to be by yourself. Stop thinking every guy you meet or like is suppose to turn into something deeper. Stop looking past the guy that's NOT in the spotlight bc you think he might be "lame". Stop being stupid!!!
ReplyDeletethanks for the comments kimmie. i also agree with you on everything you said. people definitely need to make better choices.
ReplyDeleteThat's why I love you! You're so right, this mentality is based on limiting oneself to the same old shit time after time. Young and old women need to seek realistic things rather than some b.s. that's spoon fed based on paper thin expectations.
ReplyDeleteThank you for being you!
Good point...I definitely agree with most of your statements. I think that a lot of women have a fear of being alone and think that they do need a man to fill that void. I can't tell you how many females I have known and seen that jump from relationship to relationship..and they always seem to last about the same short amount of time. As far as judging everyone by the same standard because someone has hurt you in the past, it's not fair. But I have to admit that trust can sometimes take time in those types of situations. I can honestly say that I have, too, been hurt in the past, but I don't judge every guy I date by the same standards. After I was healed and moved on from the past, I became conscious of what I was doing and ended the cycle. What we, as women (probably some men, as well),fail to realize often after being "wronged" is that the next guy deserves a clean slate. All the non-existing positive qualities that have been scratched off from the last guy's list should not be used for the new one. I think that is the true difficulty..realizing that you're starting new with someone else. This person is not the same, and sometimes a cycle of having "no good men" (or whatever you want to call them lol) blurs the vision of realizing that that is the big picture..and realizing that's what you're doing wrong.
ReplyDeleteI really can't say why people tend to be attracted to the same type of people over and over again..I think it's because they see the same good qualities but seem to ignore the negative ones, which outweigh the good..smh. They're more so in love with their "potential" and fail to see they've fallen back into the same path with someone else of the same caliber.