i'm ready......

I've been having this..........feeling....... for a few weeks now. but I've been fighting it. I've denied it. But it keeps showing itself to me whether its been in my dreams or just in my everyday thoughts. i told myself that maybe it was just because of the music i listen to or maybe because i'm at the house alone.....that's not it either. the fact remains.........I'm ready to be in a relationship. I'm ready to give myself to someone and enjoy all the benefits of being with her.


I've enjoyed the past 3 1/2 months of "dating" and meeting new people. some were better than others. some were a complete waste of my time. But each one of them made me realize what I NEED, not what i want. And although, i can't possible get EVERYTHING that i want from one woman, i DO know that the important things are definitely attainable. Some of the girls that i have met, could have been a girl that i could have been in a relationship with, but it was just bad timing. I've had fun at the clubs and going out every weekend, getting drunk with the fellas, but i'm ready to just chill with that special one. i want us to go places in Memphis that we normally wouldn't think to go. I've found a few places in the mid town/ downtown area that look exciting to go to, but I'm not go to these places alone and look like a spaz lol i don't think i took advantage of that in my former relationship. Sure we had times when we just chilled but i don't remember us just enjoying each others company like we should have. there were times when we'd spend the entire day together, but we still argued for the majority of the day, and then we'd make up and for the last hour or so we'd be together, we would be cool again. Definitely not doing that again lol i really did learn a lot about myself looking back at my previous relationship. i did a lot of good but more bad than good. its all apart of growing up though.


Now, I'm not saying that I'm about to just jump into a relationship with the next girl i meet, because that would be stupid. lol i AM however going to focus more on the things i need from a woman instead of the want, because the "want" has been winning a lot lately and its time for a change.